Dating Playoffs

In a very Ochocinco-esque move, I am making a dating playoff bracket. There are several men I've been talking to on-line and I've decided to go out with them. I've narrowed it down to 4 lucky bachelors (god i wish i could have a rose ceremony). I am going out with the first guy (and last seed) tonight. I will attempt to go on a date with all four men and then you, readers, YOU will help me narrow it down to two, and then one lucky winner. What does the winner get, you may be wondering? A second date with me.

Here is a brief summary of our contestants.

Seed 4 (Last)...BEAN

Bean and I are going out tonight. He seems like a nice enough guy, and has been very attentive via email and phone. He wrote me a sweet email, and we seem to have some in common. So, I said I would go on a date with him and then...we talked on the phone. This phone call was 40 minutes long, but--in a nutshell--boring. The most disturbing facts about Bean that I learned in this call are that he answers the phone "Buenos Diaz," which is how Alejandro answers the phone so that freaked me out because I thought I had called the wrong number, he has a weird, nervous laugh, and he has two cars. Not good, Bean, not good. Two cars?? In Boston? Really? I'm assuming this means he has money, but I'm praying there's a personality to go with the money. He works in robotics, which is a plus. He probably will not rape and murder me. I will update tonight or tomorrow about the date.

Seed 3: TIGER

Tiger is hot. Hot. Hot. Hot. Tiger contacted me first and I just about died he's so good-looking. He works as a paralegal by day, and owns some sort of photography business. Hot. Tiger and I were writing back and forth and then one day he disappeared. I waited 5 or so days and then wrote, "where did you go?" Within the hour, he wrote back that he hadn't seen the email I had last given him (with my DIGITS. MY DIGITS). I don't really buy it. Then, he told ME to call HIM. Hmmm, Tiger, I don't know about that. I don't want to have to call. I want him to want to talk to me enough that he calls me. So, we'll see. I'm gonna call him tomorrow and see if his personality matches the sexy body and boyish face.

Seed 2: SOUL-PATCH

This dude and I have been writing on and off for awhile. Short, cute emails. I contacted him because I liked his profile. Yesterday, he asked for my number and I gave it to him (Clearly, I have no problem handing out the digits, and this will probably lead to me having to get a new phone number at some point). Anyway, he texted and it was cute. He seems the most "artsy" of these guys, jeans and t-shirt, chill. Two things: He likes opera, which just seems fake and pretentious. I hate that shit. Secondly, he has a soul patch. I'm not a big fan of soul patches, but at this very moment I am watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer (the movie) and what's his name from 90210 is in it and he has a soul patch and it looks okay, so I'm taking this as a sign from god that I should give Soul Patch a chance.

Seed 1: FACE GUY

Face guy and I have only written back and forth a couple times, but man he is awesome! Great wit, intelligent, and cracks my shit up. Plus, I can tell he spends a lot of time trying to think of what to write to impress me, which I like. We were writing about meat and how I get nervous when I have to cook red meat. He sent me very detailed instructions on how to prepare the perfect steak. Cute, right? He plays trombone and is in grad school. The only thing: his pictures are a little weird. I can't really tell if his face is cute. Its that weird kind of face that could be perfect, or could just be ugly. So, I'm calling him Face Guy. I'm hoping he has a nice face to match the incredibly awesome personality.

So, are any of these 4 lucky men Mr. Awesome? Probably not. Will I have fun with them? Hopefully.